my minds journey

Sunday, March 26, 2006

so who do we look up to these days anyway...

I read in the MX magazine on the train home last week about Josh Hartnett (Black Hawk Down). He was concerned that actors like Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton are promoting a life of self-obsession and shallowness to our young people, you are aspiring to be like them, he says, "What scares me with pop culture is that people are starting to think that's the way they should be....it's like, the culture is so focussed on a more self-oriented, kind of luck-based mentality..."

Yes it seems all but true. Just who are the role models our young women aspire to be? Are we letting them down.

It is my hope that we are setting good examples for these girls, at least as far as we control it.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

So I haven't posted for ages... just been really flat out!

Went to the Netball on Tuesday, it was heaps of fun! Both games were one sided, so that was disappointing.  However, it was great to see the games.  It was nice to Australia play live.

So I had uni again today, I am really enjoying the study.  It is very interesting, however I am starting to feel the pressure of the work load now.  But I find it mentally stimulating so I am managing to keep up the study.

It just leads me to wonder why I haven't heard some of this stuff before.  I grew up in the church yet I haven't been taught to think this way about the bible yet.  For example, actually considering that the books of the gospels were written to different audiences, and for different purposes.  Or to look at the stories in the bible and ask why the writer has placed a story where and what message he is giving the reader.

For me these questions have reopened the bible and leave me looking toward a huge book of discovering and so many interesting things to learn.  It's no longer stories that I know backwards and things that I feel I cannot live up to.  It has become a book with so many things to consider, that has a call for committment one and I now feel motivated to make.  A book that has so much to teach me.
I began to wonder why our churches don't explore the bible in this way.  Why don't our ministers teach it like this? I really think that it would be a challenge to the church.  How could the church become complacent with such a challenge.  Wouldn't people want to stay in church if it was so very stimulating!  Liam tells me that people don't want it because it's too overwhelming, it becomes to big a challenge.

I guess he is right.  I have vague recollection of a minister we had when I was in high school.  At the time I only remember the adults implying that he was lacking in Christian values because he didn't literally believe the creation story.   As a young Christian I was shocked.  A number of people in our church left the church during the ministers stint, partly because of such beliefs their "leader" held.  Looking back I wonder whether he was the heretic that they labelled him or merely a minister trying to encourage growth in his church.  Trying to challenge them and encourgae them to look at the bible more deeplly.  

So will our church listen....maybe not.  But I will not sharing the challenges that have come up for me in studying theology.

I think we need to wrestle with our faith to chew it over.  It keeps us alive, it makes it real! And certainly not comfortable!

Saturday, March 11, 2006

So how many dumb things do you have to do before you actually are stupid.  Sometimes I make stupid decisions, not in big things, but in little things, things that are not a big signifiance... but still I make a bad decision on what should be a easy and basic thing, like money in a parking meter or a tram ticket.

I sometimes wonder whether I have left my brain to rot and it is slowly decaying and gradually I am becoming more and more stupid and more and more unable to make clear decisions when it comes to those little things.

Certainly others wouldn't make such silly little mistakes, and usually I wouldn't.  But lately i do.  Why?  Why when I know better?

Some people might say it's because i don't think something through before I do it, yet mostly I am the sort of person who plans ahead, well at least I thought.

I get frustrated at this, frustrated because I made such a stupid mistake.  Frustrated because others know I made such a silly mistake and frustrated because people think that I made a dumb mistake.

Others times I wonder if it's too late, I'm destined to a life of silly little mistakes.

I feel I have come to a point in many ways where I am unable to turn back in some people's opinion of me.

It makes me wonder, how can we, humans wipe the slate clean.... too easily we continually judge/view people by their past, what we've experienced of them, things they're done, said.

Can we really start from scratch, or is it always going to be there... that memory of whatever it is.... tainting the way we view that person, creating the image we see in them, who they are when we define them.

I believe God can do this and oh how I would love to fully grasp this in my own life.  Unconditional, wipe the slate clean relationships, as well as the power to move forward in my struggles and give others a reason to wipe my slate clean.

Thursday, March 09, 2006

Life is just so busy.... its overwhemling sometimes.  So much to do, so much I want to do.  But oh so tired... and I know that I get too stressed and then I'm not happy. In turn I make others unhappy.  How can I find a balance.  

Sometimes it's all so overwhelming.  It builds up inside me and overflows.  God help me find your peace.  God show me teach me to be quiet and still, to be patient and understanding.  Show me to find rest in you.

Friday, March 03, 2006

So I  started uni this week!  I am going to be busy!  But I am excited about it, it is stimulating.  I have found my first two classes have just wet my appetite for it, I only hope that I can keep up this positive outlook.