That curious parent child relationship - what are the influencing factors?
I am reading a book, "We need to talk about Kevin," in which a mother reflects on her journey as a mother to a son who at 16 commits a murderous act. It very blatantly asks the question, just how much did she shape what her son had become? I'm often told that know my mother, "oh you're so like your mother." I see in myself aspects of my parents that I like and perhaps some traits that I am less comfortable with. It begs the question just how much do our parents shape who we become? Whe do we begin to take responsibility for it ourselves?
I think in some cases I have felt a sense of responsibility for my parents, for their behaviour, for who they are. Yet I am led to question myself as to where my responsibility stops and theirs begins.
In some ways I guesss it is not dissimilar to the embarassment of a young person when their parent is in the presence of their peers. the embarassment is caused by the feeling of responsibility the young person has for the parent's actions. Yet in reality the child has usually little contol, much less responsibility for their parents behaviour. The point of my ramblings is to explore the curious link we have with those who we call family.
To what extent is the parent responsible for the child they produce? Following on from that, as a child to what extent is a parent a reflection on the child?