my minds journey

Sunday, September 17, 2006


Today we had greenthirst (an all day prayer) at church. The focus of the day was love makes the world go around.
We reflected a lot about love, things that it isn't and things that it is. I am really challenged by the notion of what true love really means, and how I can reflect that in my own life. Without love I have nothing, so it certainly is worth developing this deep sense of what love is and how I can share it.

I was talking to Liam about this amoung other things, and it keeps coming back to what it really means to be all these things we strive to be. Ironically, when I decide that I am humble, I am exactly the opposite, similarly with love, when I think I have love, am I not boasting. These things seem almost illusive, yet so valuable.

Saturday, September 16, 2006

Deny thyself and take up your cross

We talked about self care in pastoral care on thursday night.
It is an area I struggle with, I guess I have always thought that I have to work hard and therefore anything for "me" goes to the bottom of the list. Very often I don't get to the bottom of the list.

A concept that I believe is a crucial part of faith is to "deny yourself and take up your cross." This has shaped my understanding of God and my understanding of my response to God.

However, sometimes my understanding of deny self sits in tension with self care. (I hold both to be important to be my faith and my own self growth).

We talked briefly about it in class and it got me thinking, "what is self?" and "what does it really mean to deny ourself?", "Can we deny ourselves so much that their is no self and therefore nothing left?"

I will consider these questions more deeply and keep you posted. I am interested of your thoughts.